Well, we’ve made it to Matchweek 32, and for the 32nd consecutive week I’ve put off writing this until the 11th hour. Where does the time go? It flies when you’re having fun, eh. This weekend sees a full slate of games – with five on Saturday, four on Sunday – with Newcastle and Manchester United in the primetime slot, and finally Bournemouth and Fulham to round it out on Monday evening. You’ve made it to the weekend, you know the saying. Kick your feet up, grab a pint, and get stuck into some Matchweek 32 predictions.
Manchester City vs. Crystal Palace
12:30, Saturday, 12 April, The Etihad
Well, let’s hope to avoid a repeat performance of whatever was on display at Old Trafford last weekend. I was dead asleep 15 minutes in – and thank God for that. Following the draw, City now sit 6th in the table – a point behind 5th place Newcastle, who also have a game in hand. It’s beginning to look like a very real possibility that Pep and City may just miss out on Champions League football next season – an unimaginable thought six months ago. Palace played in what may have been the most entertaining game of last weekend – fighting, and I mean fighting, to a 2–1 victory over their rivals Brighton – in a match that saw three sendings off in the final 15 minutes. As a result, they’ll be without both Eddie Nketiah and Marc Guéhi this weekend – but ask them how much they care. The Eagles seem to have returned to the form that they discovered at the end of last season – and I think they might just have a sucker punch in store for City’s hopes of European football.
Prediction: 1–1
First Goal Scorer: Omar Marmoush
Anytime Goal Scorer: JP Mateta
Brighton & Hove Albion vs. Leicester City
15:00, Saturday, 12 April, The Amex
At this point, Ruud may as well lace up his boots from the ’90s and toss himself in the mix – it couldn’t be worse than it’s been in recent weeks. What bothers me about Leicester’s campaign this season is that they do have players who’ve proved they can compete at this level – it’s just an overwhelming malaise and lack of character that has absolutely torpedoed any chances of them staying up. When I watch them play, I don’t see players running – even jogging most of the time, for that matter. There’s no fight for the badge and, quite frankly, it’s fairly insulting to those who follow them home and away across the country. They’ve resigned themselves to packing it in, and that’s exactly what they’ve done. Brighton run riot despite their own recent dip in form.
Prediction: 3–0 Brighton
First Goal Scorer: Kaoru Mitoma
Anytime Goal Scorer: Danny Welbeck (x2)
Nottingham Forest vs. Everton
15:00, Saturday, 12 April, The City Ground
Forest will be disappointed to not have gotten a result at Villa Park last weekend. After starting the game about as poorly as you could imagine – finding themselves two behind inside 15 minutes – Nuno’s Tricky Trees battled back. Finding a goal back through Jack Grealish’s Portuguese twin just shy of the hour mark, and with attacking momentum only seeming to build from this moment, a draw looked a near certainty at times in the final 30 minutes. It wasn’t to be though, and Villa were able to hang on to put a minor dent in Forest’s quest for Champions League football. Everton fought to a grand old draw against Arsenal at Goodison Park on Saturday – and you guessed it – according to Arsenal it was the PGMOL, or injuries, to blame. Can’t remember which they went with this time, probably both. I think this will be a low-scoring affair – with one goal enough to take all three points. Everton have looked good in recent weeks, but I think they’ll be punching above their weight to take any points from Forest away from Goodison.
Prediction: 1–0 Forest
Only Goal Scorer: Morgan Gibbs- White
Southampton vs. Aston Villa
15:00, Saturday, 12 April, St Mary’s
Southampton’s relegation was mathematically confirmed last weekend – making them the first side to be relegated with seven games remaining in a Premier League campaign in the history of the competition. Well done lads, way to leave your mark. They were battered by Spurs in North London and then sacked Ivan Jurić – but he was hardly to blame for the atrocity that this season became. They still remain a point off of the all-time low – 11 points – and I’d be willing to wager a significant sum of money that it stays this way this weekend. I thought Villa showed themselves well in Paris on Wednesday night – despite the 3–1 scoreline. The positive for Villa is that Southampton don’t have Dembélé, Doué, and Kvaratskhelia leading the line. Bloodbath.
Prediction: 4–0 Villa
First Goal Scorer: Ollie Watkins (x2)
Anytime Goal Scorer: Morgan Rogers, Marcus Rashford
Arsenal vs. Brentford
17:30, Saturday, 12 April, The Emirates
As much as I despise everything that Arsenal Football Club stands for – what a performance on Tuesday night. Two stunners from Declan Rice and a third from Mikel Merino handed Arteta’s side a 3–0 advantage heading into the second leg in Madrid next weekend. Who needs a European Cup when you can win one leg of a quarter-final at home, eh? Brentford and Chelsea fought to a drab 0–0 draw last weekend at the Gtech – and I’d be absolutely satisfied with that result once more come Saturday. As much as I’d love to believe that, I think Tuesday had to be a lift in confidence for Arsenal – and I’d be stunned to see them come away with anything apart from three points in this one.
Prediction: 1–0 Arsenal
Only Goal Scorer: Declan Rice (set piece)
Wolverhampton Wanderers vs. Tottenham Hotspur
14:00, Sunday, 13 April, Molineux
Big Ange is now ranting about sabotage due to leakage of his teams prior to kick-off. I will say I’m a bit disappointed with the jovial Australian’s ravings in recent weeks, but I do also have a modicum of sympathy for some of the challenges that he’s been made to face this season. All in all – I perceive Ange as a good person – and quite frankly someone that I’d love to share a pint with, so that will shelter him from a fair amount of my criticism. Spurs took apart Southampton last weekend – as you’d expect – but this weekend presents a tougher challenge. With one eye on the second leg of the Europa League quarter-final in Frankfurt next weekend – this very well could have an effect on Sunday afternoon. Wolves have regained a pulse – they haven’t lost in the league since early March – and I think Molineux just may have enough Black Forest magic left to conjure a draw come Sunday afternoon.
Prediction: 1–1
First Goal Scorer: Jørgen Strand Larsen
Anytime Goal Scorer: Son Heung-min
Liverpool vs. West Ham United
14:00, Sunday, 13 April, Anfield
Well, last Sunday was a bit shit, wasn’t it? After Alexis Mac Allister had channelled his inner Steven Gerrard and lashed us ahead inside of 15 minutes, a nightmarishly comical 20 minutes of defending to follow would prove to put the game out of reach. Apart from the 20-minute period where we forgot how to kick a football, I actually thought we played alright – but if you ship three in 20 minutes away from home in this league, you’re always going to be up against it. No dramas, we go again – we’ve put five past West Ham both times we’ve played them this season (once in the League and once in the Cup) – so just go do that again lads and get the open-top bus ready – please don’t do anything daft.
PS: The King is here to stay – rejoice.
Prediction: 2–0 Liverpool
Only Goal Scorer: Who else?
Chelsea vs. Ipswich Town
14:00, Sunday, 13 April, Stamford Bridge
Ipswich is all but down, and Chelsea need to keep picking up three points to guarantee Champions League football next season – it should be that simple, but it so rarely is. I commend Ipswich on the character that they’ve shown throughout the year, but character alone isn’t enough. Few players, with the exception of Liam Delap and (some weeks) Omari Hutchinson, truly have the quality to be consistent in this league – and over the course of seven months that fact has become glaringly obvious. While Chelsea haven’t looked close to the form that they began the season on in recent weeks, this one at the Bridge should be fairly straightforward.
Prediction: 2–0 Chelsea
First Goal Scorer: Cole Palmer
Anytime Goal Scorer: Nicolas Jackson
Newcastle United vs. Manchester United
16:30, Sunday, 13 April, St James’ Park
Sir Jim will be devastated as he hands André Onana his Gameweek cheque after the performance that he put on in France on Thursday evening – in fact, I’m fairly certain that he’s already devised a plan for the kitchen staff and other employees on minimum wage to pay for it. United remain in 13th after last weekend’s snoozefest against City at Old Trafford – something that I would not have been shocked by if you’d told me six months ago – they’re dreadful. Newcastle sleepwalked through Leicester last weekend – the Toon are well and truly flying, and scoring goals that only Leicester can concede along the way (see Jacob Murphy’s second). To put it mildly, I think this may get ugly, and the uglier it gets, the harder I’ll cackle. Howay the lads.
Prediction: 3–0 Newcastle
First Goal Scorer: Alexander Isak (x2)
Anytime Goal Scorer: The real Bruno
Bournemouth vs. Fulham
20:00, Monday, 14 April, Vitality Stadium
Unfortunately, the Cherries have well and truly fallen off a cliff. With each passing week, the dream of Europe looks increasingly less likely, and the liquid football that was on display so often in the early stages of the season seems to have abandoned them completely. Fulham rode a 20-minute onslaught to hand Arne Slot his second league defeat of the season last weekend – and the Cottagers now find themselves in 8th place and looking like decent challengers for the final Europa League place. Only three points separate the two sides, despite their current contrast in form, so this has all the makings to turn into an entertaining game of football – far too much energy for a Monday night, if you ask me. I can’t see Fulham losing after the performance they put in last weekend, but the Vitality has also been difficult to escape from with three points. I think it’s only right to sit on the fence.
Prediction: 2–2
First Goal Scorer: Evanilson
Anytime Goal Scorers: Rodrigo Muniz, Antonee Robinson, Antoine Semenyo
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