We’ve reached the point in the season where I’m officially stretched beyond my capabilities to write these twice weekly. While Matchweek 14 will be occurring on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday of this week, there are simply not enough hours in the day, and I do not have the mental capacity to write predictions for 20 games in the span of 3 days. Therefore, I will continue with the Friday predictions and make mention of Matchweek 14 when and where I can. To begin — Lopetegui’s going to be out of a job in the next 30 minutes. Sit back, grab a pint, and enjoy some Matchweek 15 predictions.
Everton vs. Liverpool
12:30, Saturday, December 7th, Goodison Park
This will be the second of two difficult away fixtures that Arne Slot’s men will have to navigate this week, with Wednesday’s game at St. James’ Park. I believe that a total of 4 points from these fixtures would be an acceptable tally. Everton has been disappointing to say the least thus far this season, and regardless of the outcome of the Toffees’ game against Wolves midweek, this is always a game where form seems to have no bearing on the outcome. The 2–nil defeat suffered at Goodison at the tail end of last season still stings, and I hope to God that it is put right on Saturday. Also, giving this the half-noon timeslot is absolutely criminal. Barring a draw in the FA Cup, this looks as though it will be the last Merseyside Derby played at the Grand Old Lady, and while it will no doubt be a terrible place to go because of the atmosphere that will be on display, I have faith that we will get over the line; it just may not be pretty.
Prediction: 2-1 Liverpool
First Goal Scorer: Darwin Núñez
Anytime Goal Scorers: Mohamed Salah, Dwight McNeil
Aston Villa vs. Southampton
15:00, Saturday, December 7th, Villa Park
Villa currently find themselves in a nightmarish run of form following a 3–nil pasting at Stamford Bridge last Saturday. The Villans’ last league win came on October 19th, and from that point, they have lost 5 and drawn 3 in all competitions. This miserable run has seen them slide to 12th in the table, and if they can’t find a way to rebound midweek against Brentford, or at the weekend at home to Saints, serious alarm bells will be going off. I think the two fixtures are just what Emery’s side need at the moment to get their feet back beneath them, and I think we will see key players start to regain some form over the course of this week.
Prediction: 3-1 Villa
First Goal Scorer: Ollie Watkins (x2)
Anytime Goal Scorers: Morgan Rogers, Tyler Dibbling
Brentford vs. Newcastle United
15:00, Saturday, December 7th, Gtech Community Stadium
Neither of these sides have simple fixtures midweek, and now, in the midst of the portion of the season with games coming thick and fast, it will be interesting to see if the emotion associated with these midweek games will have a bearing on results at the weekend. I still can’t get a read on Newcastle; they continue to resemble Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde — you truly never know what to expect. While Brentford have appeared more consistent, it hasn’t been by a large margin. The Bees’ only loss in the league at the Gtech came in September against Manchester City, and given Newcastle’s torrid away form, I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Bees coming away with all three points come Saturday evening.
Prediction: 2-1 Brentford
First Goal Scorer: Bryan Mbeumo
Anytime Goal Scorers: Kevin Schade, Callum Wilson
Crystal Palace vs. Manchester City
15:00, Saturday, December 7th, Selhurst Park
It seems as though Oliver Glasner has steadily righted the Palace ship following a particularly rocky start to the campaign. The Eagles went on the road Tuesday night and picked up a hard-fought and thoroughly deserved three points at Portman Road, which we’ve learned is no easy feat — ask Ruben Amorim. If City drop more points at home to Forest tomorrow evening, the side may truly be teetering on the verge of an all-out tailspin. Assuming that City do indeed take care of the Tricky Trees on Wednesday, a turnaround trip to Selhurst Park is certainly not the ground you would want to go to in order to continue building confidence. I think Palace has a good chance of getting points from this fixture, and because I’ve now put this into writing, expect a Haaland hat trick in the first 15 minutes.
Prediction: 1-1
First Goal Scorer: Eberechi Eze
Anytime Goal Scorer: Erling Haaland
Manchester United vs. Nottingham Forest
15:00, Saturday, December 7th, Old Trafford
United dismantled Everton on Sunday at Old Trafford. If Beto were a full-time footballer, the Toffees could have easily found themselves 2 ahead early on, but he squandered both chances, and that was that. United’s first real test under Amorim will come midweek at the Emirates. I’ve never wanted United to win a game of football in my 28 years of life on this planet, but if they decided to fluke one out of their ass on Wednesday, I would not be complaining. Win or lose, I’ll have ammunition, and for that reason, I cannot complain. Forest has sputtered in recent weeks after their temporary transformation to 1970s Brazil at the beginning of the year, and with two trips to both the Red and Blue sides of Manchester in the span of 72 hours, it remains to be seen if any of this magic can be recovered. It would be great if it could be, but I don’t see the Tricky Trees walking out of Old Trafford with anything to show for it, given their current form.
Prediction: 2-0 United
First Goal Scorer: Alejandro Garnacho
Anytime Goal Scorer: Rasmus Højlund
Fulham vs. Arsenal
14:00, Sunday, December 8th, Craven Cottage
The Cottagers welcome Arsenal on Sunday afternoon in what may prove to be a more interesting fixture than one might believe at first glance. Fulham has been in great form as of late, and as I’m writing this, they currently lead a decent Brighton side at the break on Thursday afternoon. Arsenal defeated an atrocious United side yesterday evening at the Emirates, scoring from two corners, and essentially threatening with every set piece that they won over the course of the 90. Craven Cottage has proved a difficult venue for Arteta over the years, and Fulham emerged victorious over the Gunners there last December in the midst of a title run. Can they do it again on Sunday? I really hope so, but I highly doubt it.
Prediction: 2-0 Arsenal Set Piece Coach
First Goal Scorer: Bukayo Saka
Anytime Goal Scorer: William Saliba
Ipswich Town vs. Bournemouth
14:00, Sunday, December 8th, Portman Road
Following a 1-nil defeat at home to Crystal Palace, the Tractor Boys now sit in 17th place, 3 points adrift of safety as it currently stands. While it is only December, you sense that McKenna’s side need to start maximizing their opportunities to pick up points at home when possible if they are to avoid the drop come May. While Bournemouth has been on fire at the Vitality this year, their form away from home has often sputtered — all the more reason that I believe it to be vital that Ipswich finds a way to scrape points by any means necessary this weekend. For absolutely no reason, apart from a feeling in my gut, I think that they will do just that. It may be the scrappiest 1-nil you’ve ever seen, but they all count just the same.
Prediction: 1-0 Ipswich
Only Goal Scorer: Omari Hutchinson
Leicester City vs. Brighton & Hove Albion
14:00, Sunday, December 8th, King Power Stadium
Well, after appearing to be dead, buried, and careening completely out of control, the Foxes showed their resilience with a 3-1 pasting of West Ham at the KP on Tuesday afternoon. The Foxes currently find themselves 4 points clear of the drop zone, and much of this fact is due to their home form. Brighton, on the other hand, has shown their quality away from the Amex for much of the season, with their only losses coming at Stamford Bridge and Anfield thus far. (Correction: they’ve just been absolutely battered for the last 20 minutes at Craven Cottage) When fully fit, Brighton can go toe to toe with anyone in the league, and although they are still missing several players through injury, I think Sunday should be pretty straightforward for Fabian Hurzeler and the Seagulls.
Prediction: 2-0 Brighton
First Goal Scorer: João Pedro
Anytime Goal Scorer: Lewis Dunk
Tottenham Hotspur vs. Chelsea
16:30, Sunday, December 8th, Tottenham Hotspur Stadium
One of the more (unbiasedly) interesting matchups of the weekend sees Maresca’s Blues commuting to North London to take on Spurs. Chelsea thrashed Southampton 5-1 midweek, continuing their recent run of great form. This fixture seems to always provide fireworks and entertainment, and I’m hoping for more to be on display come Sunday. While I can’t imagine Maresca and Big Ange re- creating the Tuchel and Conte touchline melee of 2022, it makes me laugh to think about. Vicario’s absence for the foreseeable future will certainly be a blow to Spurs, but then again, you just never know what you’re going to get. I think there will certainly be goals, but I’m not as convinced that there will be a winner.
Prediction: 2-2
First Goal Scorer: James Maddison
Anytime Goal Scorers: Nicolas Jackson, Dejan Kulusevski, Levi Colwill
West Ham United vs. Wolverhampton Wanderers
20:00, Monday, December 8th, The London Stadium
A fixture so poor that they reserved it for objectively the worst day of the week- there isn’t much more to say. Wolves went to Goodison Park midweek and shipped 4 goals. Craig Dawson went level with Dwight McNeil this season for top goal scorers at Goodison following his brace of own goals. I’ve talked about Wolves possessing a modicum of quality that remains to be seen so far this year, yeah, I think I may have just been wrong- I’m not sure it exists. West Ham, after seemingly turning a corner on Tyneside last weekend, promptly resumed business as usual with a bewildering 3-1 defeat at Leicester, and my God have they been a hard watch as well. I’m racking my brain for positives here and am coming up empty- just go to work, it will be better than watching this.
Prediction: 2-2
Only Goal Scorer: Craig Dawson (2 for each team)
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